I am a sucker for a good dating sim. From Samurai Love Ballad PARTY! to Love in Deep Space, I am not afraid to break a few imaginary hearts. Last March, while interviewing voice actor Abby Trott, she gave me a look at her future. Along with DAN DA DAN Season 2 and Demon Slayer: Infinity Castle, she also mentioned contributing her voice talent to Date Everything!
When Date Everything! came out back in June, I didn’t have a chance to pick it up. I nabbed it for the Switch 2 the other day. I’ve been playing it when I’m not playing Ghost of Yotei or Silksong (reviews coming soon). Being the first game from Sassy Chap Games, I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be my typical dating sim. And I was not disappointed.
What They Mean When They Say Date Everything!
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Date Everything, you say? What? Like the lamp? The drapes? The dishes? Yeah, that’s exactly what it means. Getting “laid off” from a job you only have for a good ten minutes, things get sketchy pretty fast at home. After a text from a mysterious stranger named Tinfoil Hat, a drone arrives with a gift. Don’t ask questions, just open it and when you start talking to the glasses, it’ll all start to make sense… sort of.
Granting sentience to everything from the trash and the couch to the breaker box and the doors, there is almost nothing you can’t date. With 100 different household objects to get cozy and acquainted with, ach one has a unique voice and personality. There are so many of my favorite voice actors from gaming and anime contributing. Discovering each one adds a whole other layer of fun to the game. Just a few off the top of my head include the aforementioned Abby Trott, Felicia Day, most of the cast of Critical Role, Ray Chase, Neil Newbon, and Aimee Carerrero.
Sassy Chap’s Dating Sim Has More Depth Than You’d Expect
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Dating everything in the house is a hilarious concept. Just because it’s funny, however, doesn’t mean it doesn’t have depth. Each household object has a backstory and history in the house. If you’re not careful while talking to them, you can really mess things up pretty quickly. I learned this hard way when trying to romance Eddie and Volt. I missed an important dialogue objection and wound up with the pair hating me. I’m not saying I was devastated, but… yeah, I am saying that.
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I have always been one of those gamers who can’t stand having her imaginary friends upset with her. I’m that Commander Shepard who finishes every Mass Effect 2 game with everyone alive, happy, and ready to come back for ME3. I save everyone. I’m an imaginary people pleaser, so my dismay when Volt told me to never show my face around the breaker box again was palpable. I am not even going to talk about how many times I went back to an earlier save to try and fix it. And I’m certainly not going to admit that I started the game over to make it right. That would just be weird… right?
Having one of the household objects hate you isn’t the end of the world, of course. You actually open up the opportunity for another dateable who actually thrives on your rejections. So, if you’re on the masochistic side, make them hate you. You’ll find someone who takes great pleasure in your suffering and low self-esteem, and that’s okay.
Date Everything! On A Scale of 1 to 10
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Indie game developer Sassy Chap Games was formed by voice actors Robbie Daymond, Ray Chase and Max Mittelman. Date Everything! is their first game, and I sincerely hope they have more clever concepts up their sleeves. I was intrigued by this game, but I wasn’t in a hurry to rush out and pick it up on release. That is my one big regret because I actually love it a lot more than I expected to, and wish I could have been playing sooner. Lesson learned!
Whether you’ve ever wondered what it might be like to date your dishes or even your bed, or you just love a good dating sim, I definitely recommend Date Everything! I have had so much fun playing this game that I highly recommend it. It’s entertaining, silly, and deeper than you’d expect. Who knew the sink was capable of having an identity crisis, or the mirror was happy to cheer me on, even when he was a little lonely?
On a scale of 1-10, I would give Date Everything! a high 8.
